Game of Thrones S7 Ep4

In contrast to last episode, this one seemed like it was all battlefield drama. In reality, the fight only took about ten minutes but it felt longer.

It was also the shortest episode this season. Which confuses me. How can one episode not be the same length as the rest? Finales are usually longer but we're only at episode four!

So far I've been enjoying this season even though every episode is a painful reminder that I've forgotten some bit character or a minor plot set-up from a previous season.

I've also forgotten most of the non-main character's names.

In my defence, a lot of them do have silly fantasy names and a lot of them do sound a lot.

As always... spoilers.

Alright so, this episode had the reunion of Starks - Arya, Sansa and Bran in one locale, and then Jon Snow and Theon (alright, this ones's a technicality)

Cersei glares daggers at the Iron Banker mook even though they're about to pay off their considerable debt. I kinda hoped Elena would dispose of the gold and other wealth once they saw the army approaching. But then this is Game of Thrones not Game of Holy Crap We're In so Much Debt~!

Arya and Sansa have a more heartfelt reunion than anyone has with Bran the rude bastard.
Sansa's like hahaha oh Arya, you and your killing aspirations..
Arya be like where you think I've been for the last six seasons and oh BTW check out my mad fighting skills. 

Littlefinger gives Bran a catspaw dagger that was given to an assassin to kill him way back when and it totally does not belong to him man, he was just holding it for a friend. Anyway, I'm at a loss as to whether this is a an attempt to win over another random Stark kid or if he felt he had to give a dagger to a dude only or if he felt Bran - being so easily pushed out of windows and shit as he is - wasn't keeping up with his personal self defence and therefore really needed this ironic dagger.

Bran tells him "chaos is a ladder" and Littlefinger's like WTF son, you creepy and leaves.
I forgot this was something Littlefinger and Varys were chatting about in SEASON FREAKING THREE because that was many FREAKING MOONS AGO.

Bran is a dick to Meera basically saying thanks for pulling my carcass around the seven kingdoms and for letting everyone die for my sake but I don't need you anymore, buh-bye. 
Meera does what I was hoping Sansa or Arya would do - and calls him out on his dickish bullshit.
Bran's basically Carl from The Walking Dead but the difference is Carl grew up and became a bad ass while Bran's all like I'm so above Westeros you don't even know.

Missandei is walking around with Daenerys hoping that Grey Worm will come back. Daenerys is all oooh gurl gimme all the hot goss about your hook up before Jon Snow rudely interrupts to show her his cave drawings. Fandom is like oh yeah Jon Snow likes getting on his knees with girls in caves and I'm sitting here like noo... I miss Ygritte.

Sigh. Although I'm pretty sure the actors are dating in real life so that's something.
Daenerys is absolutely ticked that she's losing the war despite having the best upper hand. She wants to ride her dragons to pwn some noobs but Tyrion thinks it's too dangerous. She asks Jon what he thinks she should do, and he tells her what she shouldn't do - burn assholes alive because she's better than Cersei and actually brings hope to her people that there could be a better life out there for them.

I wish I could do my hair like that

Jon Snow watches Theon/Reek wash ashore and tells him he wants to deck him something fierce but because he did actually get Sansa out of Bolton's clutches he lives to coward out another day.

Dragonglass is sort of revealed in this episode but it's kinda hard to see. The Children of the Forest are really good at drawing and even managed to find blue crayons for the Whitewalker's eyes.

Theon wants to see Daenerys so he can rescue Yara but she's not here. What happened?

I got an idea you guys!

Traffic's pretty bad right now

So I'll just saddle up

Take in some landscapes on the back roads

Meet up with some friends

and take care of that. No worries!

Was this your immediate reaction? Surprisingly, Jaime's army was surprisingly tough when facing a Dothraki horde and a Boeing sized fire breathing dragon!

This is all I could think of (and apparently most of the internet did too) when I saw Jaime's contemplation of what hell am I in now face. 

Despite the situation he even tried to take down Daenerys and Drogon (after being shot down by Scorpion - the enormous dragon sized archery set) ((and after Drogon said screw you guys - fireblasting it and beating it to death after it had the nerve to hurt his wing) with a freaking lance. 

Bron earned his sack of spilled gold tonight after making quips, surviving a direct Dothraki assault, shooting a dragon and knocking Jaime out of the fire blast into the water. 

MY IMMEDIATE REACTION WAS HOW DEEP IS THAT FREAKING WATER? 

We saw Jaime ride his steed along the water's edge... that's fine.. then we see Bron tackle him - not very far from the water's edge, but once he's safely in the water he apparently sinks like a fucking armoured Titanic in a bottomless lagoon!  

Look at that shit! Is there no drop off at all? I was half expecting the guys to be toast anyway because the water in real life could not be that deep so close to the shore that they a) wouldn't avoid fire b) wouldn't injure themselves by diving in the shallow end or c) won't drown in their armour. 

Jaime looked pretty screwed as he sunk - but I'm sure there'll be a second last minute save.