Today I want to talk about Australian Ninja Warrior.
Yep, we finally got a version of the classic and inspiring show that we see overseas.
What a load of bollocks the show was. Don't get me wrong - the competitors were all ace and a lot of them were amazing. I'm talking about the show itself.
My first complaint was with the way they would amp up certain contestants - it was like something you'd see in a talent show or Australian Idol. It's all why we should give a rat's ass about this person and what personal struggle they're overcoming.
This is not a bad idea because a lot of the contestants we saw had overcome some serious obstacles like injuries, abuse, death, stereotypes or being differently abled. So we'd get five or so minutes with this person's life story only to see them get knocked out on the FIRST FREAKING OBSTACLE. Then we have an ad break, and come back to be told that in that short space of time at least three other competitors have also failed but we aren't supposed to care enough about them to actually see them on screen.
There's also a lot of theming going on.. which sort of stinks like the ninja's are either in it for the marketability or else the producers are forcing this onto them. Again - we're here to see your skills not to watch the gimmick you're wearing. It's not a superhero comic!
Secondly... what's the deal with the hosts?
Ben Fordham, Rebecca Madden and Freddie Flintoff. They're useless and frankly not engaging.
They're also very repetitive. Here's a fun drinking game!
Have a shot every time someone says or comments about:
This says a lot about their commentary and personalities. I get that they want a show but the reason this show is so popular and has been converted into many different versions around the world is because it's an awesome show about feats of endurance from a variety of vastly different people.
We want to watch people run the damn course, not listen to a bunch of wankers yapping on about rubbish! Dancing shows or cooking shows might need commentary - this one really doesn't need much. It's sad to say that British Flintoff is the best of the lot - even when he's wooden and usually rude or dismissive of the competitor he's at least *sometimes* funny.
I don't watch televised sports (except for Monster Jam) these days so I don't know if these guys are the standard at the moment but if they are, damn there's some explaining to be done.
Because I'm just seeing athletes and people giving this challenge a go.
You tell a whole demographic that they need an easier course to be babied through and that they can't do something, you better have a shield to hide behind. There are Olympians, Paralympians, mothers, tradies doing this course. And happily for an Australian show, there were a lot that identified as Aboriginal - another demographic that's usually overlooked or belittled in their own country.
Can you imagine what sort of uproar there would be if someone suggested a different course for an Aboriginal contestant or a Paralympian?
Can't we just be happy we have an increase in kids wanting to learn to be a ninja and do this sort of thing instead of crashing on the internet all day? People wanting to better themselves and having people to look up to while doing it that's not a Kartrashian?
Yep, we finally got a version of the classic and inspiring show that we see overseas.
What a load of bollocks the show was. Don't get me wrong - the competitors were all ace and a lot of them were amazing. I'm talking about the show itself.
My first complaint was with the way they would amp up certain contestants - it was like something you'd see in a talent show or Australian Idol. It's all why we should give a rat's ass about this person and what personal struggle they're overcoming.
This is not a bad idea because a lot of the contestants we saw had overcome some serious obstacles like injuries, abuse, death, stereotypes or being differently abled. So we'd get five or so minutes with this person's life story only to see them get knocked out on the FIRST FREAKING OBSTACLE. Then we have an ad break, and come back to be told that in that short space of time at least three other competitors have also failed but we aren't supposed to care enough about them to actually see them on screen.
There's also a lot of theming going on.. which sort of stinks like the ninja's are either in it for the marketability or else the producers are forcing this onto them. Again - we're here to see your skills not to watch the gimmick you're wearing. It's not a superhero comic!
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| Now this, though.... |
Secondly... what's the deal with the hosts?
Ben Fordham, Rebecca Madden and Freddie Flintoff. They're useless and frankly not engaging.
They're also very repetitive. Here's a fun drinking game!
Have a shot every time someone says or comments about:
- it's all about upper body strength
- the course is fair to both sexes but there's been no woman winner yet
- as they hang on it gets harder
- their muscles have to be screaming right now
- how short the contestant is
- explains the obstacles - each and every single time they're used. Same episode.
- repeats themselves
- openly jinxes a contestant while they're competing
- comments about how they have no faith in the competitor and/or surprise when they don't fail
- a wooden remark about how they failed
- talk over a slow replay of how they failed - even if it's the exact same as the last contestant
- female judge ogles male contestants
- remarking how scared the women look while ignoring the men with the same expression
- commenting constantly about the family cheering them on - especially if there are kids
- shouts. Shouts more.
- says or shouts a cliche
I don't recommend this game if you enjoy being alive and having a liver.
One contestant even looked their way and said "I can hear you, you know!" when they voiced their concerns about him.
Fordham has even called viewers who don't like their commentary 'narcs'.
They had no idea how to handle the deaf competitor.
I mean, geez - they couldn't rig up a light flash or something to let him know if he failed instead of relying on his Auslan stepson and a buzzer he couldn't hear?
Sorry, what year is this? Equal opportunity whaaa?
This says a lot about their commentary and personalities. I get that they want a show but the reason this show is so popular and has been converted into many different versions around the world is because it's an awesome show about feats of endurance from a variety of vastly different people.
We want to watch people run the damn course, not listen to a bunch of wankers yapping on about rubbish! Dancing shows or cooking shows might need commentary - this one really doesn't need much. It's sad to say that British Flintoff is the best of the lot - even when he's wooden and usually rude or dismissive of the competitor he's at least *sometimes* funny.
I don't watch televised sports (except for Monster Jam) these days so I don't know if these guys are the standard at the moment but if they are, damn there's some explaining to be done.
Thirdly - the fake drama.
Every time Australians finally put Karl Stefanovich out of sight and out of mind, up he pops again with some 'controversy'. This time he asked for different courses for men and women.
Happily, he's been shot down by contestants, viewers and the general public.
The differences in our physiology mean that yes, men are better at some things, women at others.
IN GENERAL. Not all the time.
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| Be careful not to scare the boys too much ladies |
Personally, I think the main obstacle for women on Ninja Warrior is their height and reach. And probably asshole commentators that have no faith in them.
But instead of a huge hurrah that an Aussie woman beat the warped wall (as often pointed out - took six American Ninja Warrior seasons to achieve) and was only really stopped by a drop of water.. we get this jerk going on that women need an easier course.
Do you see much difference between these two people (except that one kinda looks like Ke$ha and one has no shirt) ?
How about these two?
Anything?
Can you imagine what sort of uproar there would be if someone suggested a different course for an Aboriginal contestant or a Paralympian?
Can't we just be happy we have an increase in kids wanting to learn to be a ninja and do this sort of thing instead of crashing on the internet all day? People wanting to better themselves and having people to look up to while doing it that's not a Kartrashian?
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